An Englishman abroad -- Spending their deaths on holiday -- The promises of their ordination -- The land without Brussels sprouts -- Tour de France 1907 -- Tour de France 2000 -- The pouncer -- French letters -- Flaubert's death-masks -- Not drowning but waving : the case of Louise Colet -- Drinking ink -- Two moles -- Consolation v. desolation -- Tail-flaying -- The cost of conscientious literature -- Faithful betrayal -- Justin : a small major character.